Quick look over here!

In Random Rant, Speed Skating on January 9, 2010 at 1:45 pm

Okay, alright already!

You can all stop your moaning and complaining… ahem, Jamie Gregg. I get it. I haven’t written in like, forevskies a whole week. I know, I know… it’s called the daily A-Buce, I’m SORRY. I’m only human, alright? I actually do a number of things outside of skate around in circles and write on this here lil ol’ blog.

So. I hope you’ve forgiven me, and if you haven’t, I hope the following update and rant will change your mind and soften your heart. I know the following is going to upset quite a few people, but I need to address this very serious matter.

So, first off, let me update you with all the fascinating happenings swirling around my life.

I had a hard week of training, and I’m really happy about it. I started off with some starts, solid weights, and then transitioned into some quick aerobic intervals. On Wednesday I had one of the hardest practices I’ve had for probably three or four  months: breakdowns. Now, for those of you that don’t know what a “breakdown” is, look no further than Winona Ryder, just know that they aren’t very fun.

It’s very likely that skating breakdowns (for a sprinter) is one of the most destructive and humbling programs known to our thunder thighs and central nervous systems. To give you a subtle hint, after skating my first (of two) breakdowns, I tried to put on my guards and ended up falling down like a newborn bambi because my legs had simply had enough. Under no circumstance did they want to hold me anymore. Ha. Just another Wednesday at the oval…

I then was granted a nice and relaxing Thursday in which I just had a ride and stretch. Friday was an abstract form of pre-race as my legs still didn’t want to cooperate from Wednesdays destruction and the ice (at 7AM) was looking more like the Calf Robe bridge at 4PM on Calgary’s first snow fall. (AKA, it was slow, sketchy, and scary.)

So… with such an interesting lead up to a “training” race, I polished off the week with about two handfuls of Bridge Mixture too many, which I believe may have influenced my weight by 5 to 10 lbs. Hurray! Perfect racing, here I come!

I went to the Oval today with somewhat of a lacklustre attitude. It’s not that I didn’t want to race, I honestly just felt unmotivated. I won’t lie, I didn’t step onto the ice with racing in my heart. I wasn’t feeling absolutely terrible physically, but mentally, I was lacking from all of the commotion last week and this week’s intensive training. I wasn’t aggressive, and I was flat the whole race. Understandably, everyone has races like I did today- if you don’t, you’ll get bored with skating, realllllly quickly.

Although I’m feeling pretty meloncholy right now, I’m happy that today I was granted a first hand experience of how much faster I believe that I can skate. I had a crappy race today. Thats it and thats all. It showed me that even when I’m off my game, I can still be “alright“, but that I never want to settle for being just “alright.” I dedicate too much of my damn life to this sport, and I’m hella stubborn in that sense.

Oh well, live and learn I guess; I’m going to take my fire from this race and apply it to my racing next week in Japan. I’m excited for the trip- I’m looking forward to gaining some much needed experience for my 1000m.

So there’s the update. And now for the rant…

I hate crunchy peanut butter.

I know, I know. Half of you are probably fist pumping and dishing out high fives left, right, and centre because you wholeheartedly agree. The other 1/4 half of you are most likely cursing at your screens and ripping out your hair.

I understand that this is a touchy subject. Not many people have the balls to bring it up, as everyone knows that whether you like crunchy or smooth peanut butter is directly correlated with the core of one’s soul. Such a subject is anything but a grey area. It’s simply a black or white question. You’re either in or you’re not; good vs. bad, capitalist vs. communist, honest vs. cheat, smooth vs. crunchy.

Now, don’t play me for a fool, I know that thousands of you are thinking to yourself, “how stupid is this girl? Crunchy is obviously superior because it’s better for you, it’s crunchy because it’s less processed and fabricated. She’s like soo stupid because she’s compromising her health. Look at me, I’m  sewwww smart,” (p.s. the above is obviously meant to said in a Valley Girl accent.)

Well, all I have to say to you people, is that you’re about as bad as those people who count peanut butter as a great source of protein. I hate when people say, “Wow, I had sooo much protein in my breakfast today because I had both eggs and peanut butter.”

Why would you count peanut butter as a protein? That’s like counting tap water as a great source of calcium. It’s butter with peanuts in it. It’s a sandwich spread; a spread in which makes toast pretty. One little tablespoon is the equivallent of one serving of fat- so why would you try and make yourself sound so high and mighty granola-esque (that’s right, I just made that word up) by bringing up the fact that crunchy is less fake, manufactured, and thus “infinitley” healthier? You’re missing the point entirely. Peanut butter is in the Canadian food guide’s category of delicious, so stop justifying it as a protein.

Give me a break.

Crunchy > Smooth

enough said.

P.S. I only got 76% in Math 30… and I forget what the “greater than” symbol is. I don’t know if the above mathematical equation makes sense, but the bottom line is that Crunchy sucks!

  1. Thanks for the update Buce! I am one of the rare beings who enjoy a crunchy or smooth peanut butter, but most of all I like it the natural way – not the fakeouts like Jiffy!

  2. umm yeah, you wrote crunchy > smooth… which means crunchy is greater than smooth.

  3. That is by far the most disturbing image I have seen on the internet… Babies=Creepy, Peanut butter covered babies=Sticky creepy.

  4. smunchy>crunchy>smooth

  5. […] That is how I’ve felt since my Naturally More peanut butter discovery. […]

  6. […] That is how I’ve felt since my Naturally More peanut butter discovery. […]

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